Editor's note: Being the Editor-in-Chief of such a prestigious Journal is a great learning experience. For example I learned a new word yesterday, and am already trying to make a joke with it. I hope I don't blow it.
Dear Dr. H,
Thank you for submitting to the august Journal of Universal Rejection. In your introduction you claim certain things "are contextualized metonymically."
But I posit we in the Ivory Tower should give a thumbs down to every crumb of metonymy so as to retain the ear of Main Street.
Therefore your paper is rejected.
Caleb Emmons, PhD
Journal of Universal Rejection